Consequences

Take a gun,
shot a bullet through my heart,
leave me for dead,
That’s what she said.
I rather you be pregnant instead.
I walked away,
Unaware that today would be the day,
I’d said what I had to say.
If not now then when?
Text, email, I couldn’t dare press send,
A couple days her heart would mend.
But he doesn’t know,
Surprised her words don’t show,
I never understood no.
The temporary high,
Lie after lie,
I hope this isn’t good bye.
My fear may not kill me,
What they thought I would be,
Disappointment is all they see.
Play the waiting game,
Marinate the wounds with my shame,
I wasn’t meant to be tamed.
Its what I keep telling myself,
freedom of expression,
just a rebel trying to uphold an image.